Nice Work If You Can Get It

Oh to be the lucky headhunters at Russell Reynolds. They have landed the big search to replace Carly Fiorina at Hewlett Packard and all the prestige, pr and big fat retainer fees that go with it.

Not only that but the candidates long list has already been developed for them. So they don’t even have to burn their research budget.

Business journalists at Fortune, Forbes, as well as assorted industry watchers have been working overtime speculating as to who would be the best to replace Carly.

So in the interests of helping out our fellow recruiting brethren here is a list of the candidates most frequently mentioned by those who are watching.

Michael Capellas MCI; Capellas currently works at MCI however there is talk that MCI might be on the market and should it be acquired Capellas would be available

Capellas is so well liked in some circles that Merrill Lynch has publicly stated that he is their preferred candidate. Others aren’t so sure. You see Capellas is the former CEO of Compaq and was Fiorina’s partner in architecting the big merger. For some this suggests that HP’s board might not be too keen on Capellas since the merger has been such a collossal bust. BTW doesn't he look a little like Tony Sorpano?

John Joyce IBM; Joyce is Senior Vice President and Group Executive of IBM Global Services (IGS), the world's largest information technology services and consulting provider. An approximately $46.5 billion division of IBM Corporation, IGS has some 190,000 employees in over 160 countries..

Why is this good? Well HP considers itself as a computer services company like IBM and not just a printer company. One of the big albatrosses around HP’s neck right now is the underperformance of the services and enterprise groups (well actually only the Printer division is doing well). So what better way to fix it than to pluck someone out of the most successful company in the world in that area?

Sounds like a sensible choice to me. Also he looks like a real ass kicker.

And speaking of the printer division...

Vyomesh Joshi HP; Joshi runs HP's printer and PC divisions (now called the Imaging and Personal Systems Group,) and is generally held in high regard by employees and analysts. Selecting an in-house candidate would also allow HP to demonstrate consistency.

At the same time some feel that the Printer division could be successful no matter who was running it and may look for someone whith some proven turn around skills and who has run a global service operation (like Joyce).

On the other hand India Times practically has him in the job already.

W. James McNerney. GE; When you are looking for talent at the very top you have to find someone who is ready to move and if someone has been passed over for the top job at a company they are usually ripe for the plucking. McNerney “who lost out to Jeff Immelt at GE and has since 2001 been running tech-heavy 3M. An executive recruiter says McNerney fits the "best athlete" category—headhunter jargon for an executive capable of running almost anything because his innate abilities set him above the crowd.”

Sean Maloney Intel; If you can’t find someone who has been passed over looking for someone who is blocked is also a good choice. Mahoney is considered to be a rising star at Intel however he is second in line for the CEO role behind Paul Otellini so Maloney might be an ideal target. On the other hand Otellini will only serve as CEO for five years because of age so maybe Maloney will elect to stay put. He certainly looks happy. In fact a little too happy. I think he needs to project more toughness. I think a tattoo would help.

Ed Zander Motorola; Zander formerly was the head of Sun Microsystems and is well liked but he may not be interested in leaving Motorola where he has just begun to peak to go to HP where it would be a tough slog. And besides didn't he used to have mad crush on Buffy? No wait, that was another Zander.

Kevin Rollins Dell Computer; Everyone wants this guy but the feeling is nothing can pull him out of Dell. Besides he has already said he doesn’t want the job. And he would probably want you to hire his brother Henry Rollins and that guy is nutty.

I don't know that there is a recipe that can turn it around," Rollins said in November. "I wouldn't go there first off. I wouldn't go run that one."

Yikes! How would you like to have a candidate who has already said on record that he doesn’t know that “there is a recipe that can turn it around”.

So there is your immediate short list. However there are more potentials beyond those "big" names. If you can't convince enough of these heavy hitters to take a sniff you could also try:

Steve Mills, SVP SW IBM;
Abby Kohnstamm, SVP Marketing IBM
Nick Donofrio, SVP Technology IBM
Doug Elix SVP Sales and Dist IBM

And when you get tired of calling through the IBM phone directory...

Ray Lane, former Oracle president,and Texas Instruments chairman Tom Engibous.

And if that doesn't work Forbes magazine suggests you try your luck at companies known for producing leaders. These talent factories include companies like IBM and GE but also include:

Dell
Johnson & Johnson
Weyerhaeuser
Procter and Gamble
PepsiCo
UBS
Cisco Systems

So now that we have done all the work for you. Can we have half the fee??

Read more: Fortune; Forbes; ZDNet and previously on Canadian Headhunter: here and here

Danielle In The Lion's Den

It was snowing last night but I felt like going out for a walk and when the snow got too heavy, I stepped into a pub called The Drunken Barfer for a warm drink.

Some kind of party was going on. I saw a sign that read "Welcome, Right Whingers!" and a young fellow in a calico shirt and blue jeans was holding forth to a small group of attentive listeners.

He was saying things like: "George Bush is the greatest president since Abraham Lincoln." and "Signing on to Confederation was the worst thing Newfoundland ever did. We should have joined the United States."

Suddenly, a small woman appeared in front of him dressed in a full burka. "You must be Damian Penny," she said. "I am," he replied, "And who are you?" "I'm your worst nightmare," she announced and, immediately, there was a lot of screaming and commotion as everyone in the room dropped to the floor.

When no explosion took place we saw that she wasn't wearing a burka after all, just a parka and a balaclava for protection from the storm. Startled, she pulled off her hood and said, "Hey, everybody, it's me, Antonia Zerbisias."

"Let's get her!" someone shouted. "No!" said a brush-cut young man. "We believe in freedom! That's the difference between us and The Toronto Star. Come on, Antonia. Help us understand the lunatic view of the world today."

I soon found out what was going on. This was a meeting of Canada's right wing bloggers. They had assembled to celebrate the visit of one of their shining stars. He'd come to Toronto from the tiny village of Mount Pearl in Newfoundland and was staying with his Uncle Jed as he tried to find a wife in the big city.

"Tell us, Antonia", Damian asked, "Do you finally concede that 911 was carried out by bin Laden?"

"Hey, I'm no conspirazoid," Antonia declared. "But, tell me this. Where's the black box? They can find everything else, how come they can't find the black box? No, I can't get over that black box!" Actually, she said "black box" a few more times than that but I don't want to give you the impression that she was unreasonable - or anything like that.

The talk turned to a variety of bloggers. Damian said he was shocked to learn that Little Green Footballs was not only an old hippie, but that he was just plain old. He's 51. Antonia took this as personal insult and some catty banter ensued but no serious argument.

Eventually, she had to go. She had an appointment with
Barry Zwicker.

As for me, I found the company pleasant and had conversations of varying length with No Advice, The Heroic Techie, Babbling Brooke, The Staple Singer, The Tightly Wound Watch, Quotavicious, Canada Freak Press, Let Me Bleed, Meektriarchy, The Green Barren, American Spy in Paris, Relaxed Catholic and The Flea.
I know that a David and Jane were there, as well, and others I didn't meet.

We had an interesting waitress, too. She's an aspiring young songstress The Flea is promoting as the next big thing for teenaged girls.

Her video is on his site and, if you're wondering what's wrong with the world today, or right, maybe you'll find an answer here. (I really dig it, daddyo. And, perhaps, I should take impromptu walks more often).

Note: Nick Quotavicious (he really is) threatened to beat me up if I didn't
give him credit for his lovely photo of Antonia. So here it is, tough guy.

Update here.

The Heroic Techie

A Worker's Testimony

The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by
the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men.
Quentin Tarantino

Chris Taylor has created a document containing all of the career wisdom he has accumulated so far.

This is something he might want to pass on to his children if, God forbid, he has to leave them when they are young (and he thinks they'll go into IT).

I found it stark and impressive so I've produced an abbreviated, paraphrased version below. He's got a little of the old Rambo in him, don't you think?

Professionalism

We all work with people we don't like. So what?

I may want to knock you on your ass if I see you in the parking lot, but if I see you in the office, I will laugh, joke and share a coffee with you.

This is what duty demands.

Gender Relations

There are very few women in IT. Why? Ask Lawrence Summers.

Just don't expect an IT job to be good for your love life unless you're looking forward to a same sex marriage.

Actually, don't go out with anyone from your company under any circumstances.

Because when you split up, it's going to get ugly.

Moral Fibre of The Rulers

My credo is simple:

Serve those above.
Rule those below.

Move heaven and earth

                   to see mission accomplished.

But, I can't work for some idiot I do not respect.

I want my bosses (all the way to the top) to demonstrate honesty, integrity, courage, competence, humility and loyalty to the troops they command.

If they don't have those qualities, I will leave the job.

This is the single most important factor in determining the length of my stay.

The Interview

The problem with an interview is you can't tell a good leader from a bad one until you work alongside him.

And you won't really know him until a crisis comes and you see if he helps you or leaves you holding the bag. For,

There are no interview questions that let us
peer that deeply into the heart of a man.

Every potential boss will promise to support you to the hilt when crunch time comes. But not everyone will.

And being able to work with those who do is more important than any perks or pay.

The Story of A Crunch

I once had a CEO who was an ex-IBM senior exec.

When one project was seriously behind schedule he came down to the shop floor and yelled at the manager, calling her several variants of the F-word in front of the entire technical staff.

I wrote to the CIO about it. He dodged the issue, sending back an insipid "Very interesting." as a reply.

It was sickening.

The Future of IT

The IT sector is OK now but as Karl Marx George Harrison said , "All things must pass."

When computers get so simple the average bozo user can handle them, people like me will be cast aside.

There is nothing sad in this. That's how life is. But just remember, friend, if you're in IT, you must look ahead.

Source: Taylor, TextAmerica

The Crowds Come Out For

Recruiting Blogs On Parade

On the avenue, Fifth Avenue,
The photographers will snap us,
And you'll find that you're
In the Rotogravure.

Thought Leader, John Sumser at The Electronic Recruiting Exchange has posted a list of fantastic Recruiting blogs with words of praise for their deep insights and great accomplishments.

What does he say about Canadian Headhunter?

Profoundly disturbing blog. Two highschool students pretending to be recruiters.

Nope, sorry, that's [name deleted]. Here it is:

First post-modern recruiting blog! An absolute must!

Hey, that's more like it!

Don't believe me? You can find it right here.

Break Time!

Snowy via The Flea
Happy Music via The Irish Eagle.
More Happy Music via The Flea (Click on the first "Numa")

Bull-Roar!

Non-Verbal Communication Isn't All That!

The Non-Verbal Hogwash

I've got a bone to pick with Annie, Fortune Magazine's job-hunting advisor. Speaking of phone interviews she says:

Studies have shown that about 90% of human
communication is nonverbal, so you're in a kind
of limbo when the interviewer can't see you.

Right, Annie! Haven't you ever used the phone?. A phone conversation is not a neutral transfer of ideas. You get a real sense of what someone is like from the way he speaks.

Verbal Presentation Is Powerful

Unless a person is visually striking - in a positive or negative way - or has a peculiar smell, her verbal manner of presentation is going to be a very powerful factor in creating your impression of her.

And, unless you're looking for a romantic partner, once the person opens her mouth and you can see how well-informed and articulate she is and get a sense of her personality, other things fade into the background.

I work on the phone and although I can't see the people I sure get the feeling that I know them almost as well as if I actually met them.

Maybe even better because there are no concerns about all of the issues involved in physical presentations. I don't have to look a stranger in the eye. Or worry that my shoes aren't shined or that my zipper's undone.

And now I see that ol' Dave Teten agrees with me on this. Because according to him:

Face-to-face communication is not essential.

Origin of The Face-to-Face Myth

How did the face-to-face myth get started? In 1967, Albert Mehrabian, a UCLA professor, published research showing the significance of non-verbal cues in communications. His conclusion:

The combined effect of simultaneous verbal, vocal and facial attitude communications is a weighted sum of their independent effects — with the coefficients of .07, .38, and .55, respectively.

(Albert Mehrabian and Susan R. Ferris, "Inference of attitudes from nonverbal communication in two channels. Journal of Consulting Psychology 31 (1967): 248-252. )

This implies that in face-to-face conversation:
- 38% of communication is inflection and tone of voice
- 55% is facial expression
- 7% is based on what you actually say.

The Inventor Said It Isn't So

But Mehrabian himself said, explicitly, that these statistics are not relevant except in the very narrow confines of a similar situation.

His study only addressed the very narrow situation in which a listener is analyzing a speaker's general attitude (positive, negative, or neutral) when there is no prior acquaintance and no prior context for their discussion.

The Job Interview Is Pregnant With Context

I think that last point is important in relation to job interviews. Because then the situation comes full of context.

You often know quite a bit about the person beforehand and even when you don't the context provides many doors that allow you to dive right in to a personal conversation.

The Phony Experts

Of course the Hustlers don't care about that. All they want to do is tell you that you're missing something so they can supply it. And if they can find scientific data to support their views, so much the better.

So, next time you hear some communication or image consultant barking about the importance of non-verbal communication, take a step back.

Yeah, you want to have your shoes shined and your shirt tucked in but unless you go to modelling school you're rarely going to seem more poised than you normally are.

Just look at the politicians when they make speeches on TV. Most of them look like robots or marionettes clumsily trying to move this way and that in order to do as they were told.

You can just imagine someone offstage signalling madly "Hands up! Turn to the left! Look sincere!."

Yes, yes, very impressive. I feel better now. I can trust him. Not.

Not A Chance

We weren't even called by HP to submit proposals for the search to find a replacement for Carly Fiorina.

I guess we should have called or sent an email or something.
But heck we're just too busy writing posts about shoes and Genuity and stuff. Priorities don't you know.

Anyway Russell Reynolds was given the search and they have put their top guys on it. Well a guy and girl actually.

OK that wasn't politically correct. A man and a woman.

More specifically.

This Man (Charles Tribett):

and this Woman (Andrea Redmond) :

Good luck in your search dudes. I'm sure that there will be no shortage of candidates.

But in case the Russell Reynolds crew doesn't find anyone Canadian Headhunter will be there to pick up the pieces.


Hat tip: Peter Dawson

Rubber Soul

Wear these shoes, and be like me
Wear these shoes, and you'll free
Wear the shoes, I'm thinking of
They have soles you'll really love.
They're so fine, light as sunshine
Buy these shoes, Love.

Sometimes, coincidences do occur. For instance, I was planning to post an entry about a shoe called the Holy Sole and Lord Almighty if the great Manolo doesn't go and post one a day or two before me.

But, Land o' Goshen, he doesn't call them Holy Soles. He calls them Crocs. And his "Crocs" cost $35 USD, whereas mine cost considerably less in Canadian money.

And, finally I intended to praise the shoe and highly recommend it, whereas the Manolo, he consigned it to his Gallery of Horrors!

And, since I respect the Manolo greatly, I fear for what this means about me. But, before you start throwing your bagels at the screen, please, please, let me explain.

The Holy Sole is a plastic clog. It's made out of some sturdy kind of foam so it is unbelievably lightweight.

And, there are two versions. The one Manolo shows has an attractive "band" and is a little roomier than the basic.

The basic one, which is cheaper, has a spongier bottom which makes it incredibly comfortable if you are standing on your feet.
(I have both).

I bought these shoes from a friend of mine named Steven Dennis. We call him "Shorts", because he has an addiction to casual wear.

(Really, he'll wear shorts to an expensive dining room for dinner unless you tell him not to.)

He'll sell you these shoes (in larger volumes) at a very good price. And, he's a nice guy you can trust. If you're interested you can reach him at Dominion Smallwares in Toronto at 416-665-9256.

I bought Anthony a pair but he refuses to wear them. However, I got my brother a pair too and although he's a rough and tough guy like Tony Soprano, he called me the next day to tell me they were great.

So, I do recommend them, in spite of our friend, even if you work in an office.

As long as you don't have to meet strangers, you can leave your regular shoes in the drawer and wear these during the day.

If you're wearing a suit and you buy the black ones, I'll bet few people will even notice.

One more thing, the sizing is funny. I usually wear size 11. But in these I chose an XXL because I prefer them roomy.

And, the only thing I don't like about them is that plastic is not especially cool even when it's full of holes. But if it's cool enough to wear socks where you are sitting, you won't find them hot at all.

Shorts' brother-in-law is a surgeon in Chicago and he, apparently, bought 70 pair for the people in the hospital. And, a friend of mine thought they would be quite popular in prisons.

Hmmm. Now, I get it. The Manolo isn't writing for the people in the unpleasant institutions. (That's why he doesn't like Cuba.) But read his post anyway. Itsa very funny, as usual!

Overfed & Undernourished

Resume Verbiage Out!

More than half of all resumes are morbidly obese

So says the Canadian Resume Society.

It's a tragedy, I know. But we can help.

Listen, friends, answer this question.
Do you know what a resume is?
Here, I'll help you.

A resume is a small space in which you
have to write your life story.

Now, answer this question.
Do you know what verbiage is?
That's OK. I'll help you again.

Verbiage is the use of TOO MANY WORDS! Get it?

Now, if you know the answers to those two questions,
why are you writing like this?

Efficiently communicated project changes.
Successfully completed projects.

"I efficiently did this and I successfully did that".

Listen here, you adverbaholics!

If you put something in your resume, I assume it was successful and efficient. You don't have to tell me every two seconds!

And no matter what you write, you know I'm going to ask you for proof! (Which you probably won't be prepared to give).

So don't fill up your precious space with this braggadacio.
It's not efficient. And it's not successful.
It's excessive. And it's dumb.

Think about it. Now, don't you agree?
Come on, friends, cut the fat!
You'll be helping everyone.
But especially yourselves.

The Interview Suit.

Continuing with our now wildly successful theme of clothes to wear for a job interview this week let’s talk about the big one: the suit.

I could write for days on this topic. It is fraught with pitfalls, preferences and petty little details that drive a lot of guys over the deep end.

I know guys hate shopping (at least for certain things) so I will make this one easy for you. Well, as easy as possible.

If you don’t have a suit (or don’t have to wear one every day) you still need at least one in your closet. If you wear suits regularly you need at least three. If you are in a profession that demands you look business like at all times you should have 8-10 suits.

However I will approach this from the perspective of someone who doesn’t have a suit only needs one for special occasions or for those who don’t know squat about buying a suit (and trust me there are a lot those out there).

First the easy bit: If you only need one suit all you have to do is go buy a good navy suit.
The navy suit is considered a “classic” this means that it doesn’t go out of style and that as long as it is in good shape it can be worn on many different occasions and still make you look sharp.

The navy suit can be combined with a variety of shirt and tie combinations to produce looks that range from sober and businesslike to casual or debonair.

Plus every suit store will carry them.

Your biggest obstacle typically will be to decide how many buttons it will have and how much it should cost.

Lets start with cost.

How much should you pay for a suit? Well as much as you can afford (and then perhaps a little bit more). With suits as with many things in life you get what you pay for and you should strive to buy quality. When you walk by those stores that have 3 for 1 sales on suits? Just keep walking. The material is usually a mix of wool and manmade fibers like polyester, Teflon etc. You should only buy a suit that is made from wool and the cheapest suits aren’t 100% wool. Thus they will have that shiny “cheap salesman” look.

At the other end of the spectrum you have the big name brands like Armani, Canali, Boss, Versace etc. These suits are typically very well made but also you pay a premium for the brand name. In fact some of the designer label suits cost more than it would for you to go to a local tailor and have a suit custom made!

If you are only buying your suit for special occasions you don’t need to break the bank. Strive for a good mid price suit and you should be fine. What price is mid price? Well in Canadian dollars between 400-800 is a good range. However if you are a savvy shopper you should be able to pick one up on sale or at a warehouse outlet.

A final note about the high-end brands – they typically tend to be less conservative or and have more fashionable detailing. This is fine but remember these companies depend on their looks going “out of style” so that you have to buy their latest products.

The main thing to remember when buying a suit is that a classic look or “cut” will look good for years and years and years. I have some suits that are 10 years old and still look good.

Lets talk about “cut”. This refers to how the suit drapes on your body and how the material fits around your waist. European cuts tend to taper so that they hug your waist more, which is fine for slimmer men with broad shoulders. Full cuts as the name implies would suit a fuller figured man (i.e. beer gut). In between you have what is called the American cut. This is the cut that fits the majority of the population. And typically it is what you should go with.

But just because you have selected the correct “cut” doesn’t mean your suit will look good. Most people you see wearing suits that look poor on them have not necessarily bought a cheap suit (although it might look like it) most of them have just not bothered to get proper alterations done. The worst offenders in this area are college guys who wear their dad’s suits to interviews. It just looks wrong.

As a rule I don’t like to shop at a store where I can’t get alterations done on site. When I walk into a store and they tell me they don’t do alterations I am usually already out the door before they get to finish their sentence.

Why? Because with a suit the devil is in the details. Little adjustments in things like the length of the sleeve or the waist of the pants can make a cheap suit look expensive and an expensive suit look cheap. Now a lot of stores will say “don’t worry there is a place in the mall that does good alterations you can go there”. The problem with that is that usually it is a place that does far more women’s apparel than men’s and you want someone who is working with suits 24-7. In most places the tailor will be about 80 years old and about four feet tall. Don’t worry this is normal.

When you decide on a suit you like the tailor will come and make marks on it with a piece of white chalk. He will then perform alterations on the suit. This usually takes about a week or so. Then you can come to get your suit.

Now the most important thing to do is to try the suit on again and be prepared to have a second round of alterations done if it doesn’t look or feel right. I sometimes have had to argue with my tailor or the sales person about the length of the pants. I feel that the trend is to have them waaaay too long. The crease should break when it hits the shoes but it shouldn’t look like you are a kid wearing your father’s suit. I am not going to go into big detail on things like crease break here because that kind of thing is really boring.

In fact I am starting to get bored myself. But I know there are a couple of other things I forgot to mention. Hmm while I think of them here are some other pointers:

When you get your suit it typically (if you shopped in a decent store) be given to you in a nice suit bag with a good hanger. You can’t hang your suit on a cheap wire hanger. It will not support the weight of the suit and someday you will come in to your closet and you suit will be in a rumpled mess on the floor.

Also only have your suit professionally dry-cleaned DON’T try to wash it in your washer. You will ruin it. If it is a little wrinkled when you take it out of the closet run a warm iron over it.


Oh yeah now I remember what I wanted to talk about. Buttons. Suits come in a few varieties. Double breasted, Single breasted and then two or three button (shown at right).

Stick with the single breasted if it is your only suit. The look is more classic whereas double breasted tends to come in and out of fashion. And buy a two button single breasted. There are a lot of three button suits out there right now but this is a relatively new trend in the suit world (less than 10 years). The three-button suit might go out of style soon and you will look hopelessly dated.

Single button (seen here) however will always look good.


Next week: Interview underwear. Boxers? Briefs? Commando?

See Also: The Interview Shoe (endorsed by the Manolo!) and Casual Fridays

Kassie Defends Family From CIBC

As Toronto Judge Turns Up The Heat

This just in! Judge Jimmy Farley has ordered The Genuity Gang to hand over the personal computers of their wives and children!

The forensic boys over at Zwaig Consulting have already taken data off of 84 Genuity computers, 2 servers and 29 BlackBerries. And CIBC's pit bulls still want more.

But, gang leaders David Kassie and Dan Daviau, have refused to give up the goods.

Thank You Daddy!

Can you imagine the relief their kids must be feeling?

Especially if they have been downloading material of a "personal" nature from the internet. Or keeping a tell-all diary.

Alan Lenczner, a lawyer hired by the conspirators respectable businessmen, said the request was a blatant attempt to insult Mrs Kassie by pandering to Canadian Headhunter's, The Globe & Mail's, the business media's appetite for gossip.

The KGBC

But, wait, there's more. "This is sort of a nasty dog fight." Judge Jimmy quipped, as he ordered the defendants' personal email providers - including Microsoft Hotmail - to preserve any relevant material for future copying.

(Holy cow! I didn't know we were living in Russia!)

Let me ask you, friends, 'What's next?' Deportation to Syria for a little conference with some "auditors"? Judge Jimmy, please!

Also, Now it's The Genuity Ten!

As of last Friday, the CIBC wants to add another shadowy figure to the list of defendants.

CIBC alleges that Charles "Chuckie" Lindner, a senior exec in its US brokerage, sent two months of trading records for CIBC's Boston clients to an email address on Jan. 5, 2005 -- and resigned from the bank later that day! He now works for Genuity. (Heh, heh.)

(Note: the CIBC World Markets division of the Canadian Imperial Bank of Commerce is suing (now) ten ex-employees for stealing people and information when they went to Genuity Capital Markets).

A Little On Lenczner

I love Alan Lenczner's web site. His picture's at the top of the page. And underneath it is written:

A tour de force in both civil and administrative litigation, Mr. Lenczner's insights and skills are virtually unparalleled in the profession.

No source is attributed so you have to wonder if he wrote it himself. It goes on:

He is one of Canada’s leading litigators... well-known for his expertise... His skills as an advocate have set precedents in almost every area of civil litigation. With his extraordinary experience in large and complex litigation matters, he regularly appears before courts and tribunals across the country.

I get a few resumes that are written like this. And...(hahahahaha!) - you know how Joni Mitchell laughs at the end of "Big Yellow Taxi"?

Sources: Joey Schneider @ bloomberg.net and
Sinc Stewart, Globe & Mail

See Also: GenuityGang Strikes Back -- CIBC Recruiting Scandal -- David Kassie, Kingpin -- David Kassie's Dream -- Dan Daviau -- Earl Rotman -- Kassie Defiant -- Phil Evershed -- Hirst, Morrison, Eggertson -- Marie Cordero -- Bad 4 Recruiters -- Sweet Marie -- The Kassie Cult -- Kassie Honoured -- Hunkin's Millions -- BlackBerry Got 'Em -- Kassie Family Hunted -- Blackberry Mystery Solved -- The Genuity Revolution -- Technorati Tag: Genuity

Why Not Take A Manolo Break?

The Michael laughed his head off at this one. And this one. And this one too.. -- And so will you.

What Do Layoffs Mean?


Should you go to a company that has had major layoffs?
Here's Monty's take:

Layoffs create more negative than positive results. The reasons?

1. Layoff expenses are hard to estimate.
Restructuring charges are often higher than planned and require increased investment of execs time managing the layoffs.

2. Companies lay off the wrong people.

It's hard to figure out who is really expendable.

Managers often guess wrong and then have to figure out how to recreate lost expertise.

3. Layoffs make good staff recruitable.

Worried about the future, they are highly recruitable by predatory competitors.

Unless you increase their comp to get them to stay. And that costs you some of the projected savings from restructuring.

Layoffs are a bad sign.

They mean:
1. Management made bad decisions in the past
2. Demand for the company's products and services are declining
3. Revenues will be dropping
4. The company will lose some key personnel in the near future.

(OK, cut the girls some slack if layoffs are industry-wide, seasonal, or if a tornado wipes out customer demand).

From a very interesting business blog called Monty's Bluff.

Headhunters = Hearthunters?

The Globe and Mail discovers a new type of headhunter:

So there I was, shopping on-line for a Valentine's gift for my cat -- and wondering why Petunia remains the most significant other in my life -- when I received an intriguing e-mail message from Executive Search Dating.

This new Vancouver-based company offers professional matchmaking with a twist. Memberships cost $1,500 to $5,000 and provide unlimited access to a databank of video profiles. But once the managers have figured out what you're looking for, they send a team of "matching agents" to social events and business networking functions to find someone specifically selected for you, just like corporate headhunters.

Hmmm...... I have never worked in firm that employed matching agents to attend functions of any sort. Mostly we just sit with a big-ass directory of names and dial 7 digits until we find someone. Although I wouldn't mind doing a little matching on the side.

Poison Berry

What is a Blackberry?

A Blackberry is a wireless hand-held device which gives you access to email.

Standard Blackberry email goes through your company's computer system.

And it can be stored by the system just like any other email messages.

But every Blackberry has a personal identification number (PIN).

And, everyone thought that messages sent from one Blackberry to another using PIN numbers - instead of normal e-mail addresses - would bypass the company computers.

This would make these communications completely private.

But now we learn that if your Blackberry is on your company's network, there is software available that can capture all of its PIN-to-PIN communications.

What's all the fuss?

The Canadian Bank of Commerce (CIBC) is suing nine ex-employees for stealing people and data from the CIBC.

The case was cracked by probing the conspirators' email for evidence. And, these emails were sent between Blackberrys using PIN numbers.

So, now, Blackberry users everywhere are in a panic as they visualize John Hunkin prying into their email.

How to solve the problem

Don't be cheap. Buy your own Blackberry.

Or disconnect your company Blackberry from the company's computer. And link it to your personal e-mail account with your own Internet Service Provider (ISP).

Laying Blame

Some glib and nasty folk are trying to lay the blame for the Genuity fiasco on some of our old friends.

Because, they say, it should have been obvious that no message sent or received through a company-issued BlackBerry is safe.

Look at this:

An investment banker said he was surprised that the former CIBC employees were so naive as to believe their communications could not be tracked.

He said it was especially odd, given that one of the CIBC bankers was a technology specialist and another was a lawyer.

And this:

"You would have to be a fool to assume that kind of thing.” said Brian Sharwood, a telecommunications consultant in Toronto.

But Zipper, and Marie, don't you pay them any mind.
(And whatever you've been drinking, please, give it up!)

Sources:
The Globe & Mail here and here. And Computerworld here.

See Also: GenuityGang Strikes Back -- CIBC Recruiting Scandal -- David Kassie, Kingpin -- David Kassie's Dream -- Dan Daviau -- Earl Rotman -- Kassie Defiant -- Phil Evershed -- Hirst, Morrison, Eggertson -- Marie Cordero -- Bad 4 Recruiters -- Sweet Marie -- The Kassie Cult -- Kassie Honoured -- Hunkin's Millions -- BlackBerry Got 'Em -- Kassie Family Hunted -- Blackberry Mystery Solved -- The Genuity Revolution -- Technorati Tag: Genuity

Treason

A Wisconsin man has been fired from his job for fraternizing with the enemy. The crime? Drinking a Budweiser or more specifically being photographed drinking a Budweiser. Why is that a fireable offense? Well at the time he was working at rival brewery Miller .

"This is what happens when you drink a great beer," former C.J.W. employee Isac Aguero (seen at right in the photo that supposedly led to his dismissal) said.

Sounds like a ringing endorsement for Budweiser. So is Isac going to be working at Bud any time soon??

"I was actually thinking I was going to go apply at Anheuser-Busch," Aguero said.

Thinking about it? Your resume should be there already. And not just in HR I would be talking to their advertising firm. I mean if Bud doesn't turn this into a major pr campaign they are really really really stupid.

Canuck Bosses Not Blogalicious

Canadian execs aren't following US counterparts
into setting up corporate blogs.

Mark Cuban, Corporate Blogger

David Schatsky, SVP at Jupiter Research, recently asked a room of 50 people how many wrote blogs.

No one did. A couple read blogs. A third knew what they were.

They were at a Web Content Management conference in Quebec.

(This fits our image perfectly! Pushy Americans: always rushing into things. Getting their noses in everywhere. Canadians: so much more sleepy polite and loveable. But still on the leading edge. Hey! Am I missing something here?)

See article

UPDATE: Here are some Canadian CEO bloggers.
Stu Butterfield, Ludicorp / Flickr (Looks kind of girlie)
Rob Hopper, iUpload
Mike O'Connor, Mansfield Communications
Elliot Noss, Tucows

Handsome John Hits It Big!

"He's Rollin' In It!"

Handsome John Hunkin has taken a beating in the press recently playing a crusty John Wayne to David Kassie's Monty Cliff.


But, if the proof is in the pudding, when it comes to pudding, this guy still knows how hoover it in.
Congratulations, John. Mind you, this salary is pre-Genuity. Wishing you well for next year too!

As celebrated headhunter, Ma'tin Yate, once said, "Knock 'Em Dead!"


Title: CEO, CIBC

Base salary 2004: $1-million
- including a 100K increase; first since '99

Performance bonus 2004: $3-mill+

Restricted share awards 2004: $4.2-mill
Stock Options: 50,560

The Bank's Earnings 2004: $2.2-billion

Most Altrustic Action:
- In 2002, the bank suffered a 61% drop in profits
- Handsome Johnny turned down performance bonuses
  & stock options!
- (So did Academy Award Nominee, David Kassie)

Other Prize Winners!

Dickie Waugh, Prez-CEO Bank of Nova Scotia
Base 2004: $1-mill
Restricted stock units: $3-mill

Performance Bonus: $1.6-mill deferred shares
Stock Options: 230,768 stock options.

Most Admirable Action
- led bank's best year: earnings of $2.9-bill, up 18% 2003.

Gordie Nixon: CEO Royal Bank
- $3.2-mill in salary and bonuses in 2004

- Watch out Gordie! Royal's full-year profit   declined for the first time since 1999
  (from $3.01-bill. to $2.83)


See The Globe and Mail

See Also: GenuityGang Strikes Back -- CIBC Recruiting Scandal -- David Kassie, Kingpin -- David Kassie's Dream -- Dan Daviau -- Earl Rotman -- Kassie Defiant -- Phil Evershed -- Hirst, Morrison, Eggertson -- Marie Cordero -- Bad 4 Recruiters -- Sweet Marie -- The Kassie Cult -- Kassie Honoured -- Hunkin's Millions -- BlackBerry Got 'Em -- Kassie Family Hunted -- Blackberry Mystery Solved -- The Genuity Revolution -- Technorati Tag: Genuity

Carly Fiorina out at
Hewlett Packard.

Carly Fiorina is on the job market although her resume hasn’t shown up in our inbox yet but that could be because we keep our hotmail junk filter set at high and it puts all emails from people that are not already on our list in the junk mail folder.

Which of course means that we have to start checking the box every day to make sure it doesn’t get deleted automatically.

Carly was derided in Slate magazine as a “rock star” CEO. Which surprised us because we never heard any of her songs. A quick check of Kazaa revealed no Carly mp3s being traded by geeks. Although they could be on some bit-torrent site somewhere.

Perhaps Slate was confusing her with Carly Simon?







Now that such a high profile female CEO has been ousted the questions will begin as to whether gender played a role in Carly’s fall. Carly however denies that her breast size had anything to do with it.






Those who remember her tenure at HP say they will miss her inability to work gadgets.






And her belief that holding IPOD’s to the sky helped her communicate with aliens.



Mostly though they will miss her skills in pointing.



She was a really good pointer.



Now that the CEO job is vacant the folks here at Canadian Headhunter would like to throw our hat into the ring and declare our interest in taking on the assignment for a small fee. HP can contact us via the hotmail address on the right.

We’ll set the junk mail filter to medium for a few days. And just so we don’t miss it make sure the subject line says something like: Big Fat Retainer Check for You!!!

SCIENCE PROVES IT:
COO, A Ridiculous Role

If you're going to a company with a COO, watch out!
Chief Operating Officers make companies worse.

Researchers studied 404 firms
over a 10 year period.

Results: Companies with COOs have lower returns on assets (ROA) and market to book (MTB).


Conclusion: The CEO-COO structure stinks.
Alternate conclusion: The COO's studied all stink.

via Monty's Bluff

The Honours Pour In

Kassie Nominated!

The Canadian Auto Workers have nominated David Kassie for an Academy Award of Business.

Specifically...

The Maltese Falcon Award for
Back-Stabbing & Double-Crossing

Boy Wonder, David Kassie, sets up Genuity Capital with just a few former colleagues from CIBC - who jump ship the day after receiving huge year-end bonuses from their former boss. One to watch. (90 min, Canada)
Find it here

Why They Leave

Do you lie in bed each night wondering if your people are thinking of leaving?

Of course not. You are more concerned with the production quotas, or the quarterly shareholders meeting or the new office space that you are hoping to lease. Right

I got to thinking about this because there was an article on line about keeping tech employees happy that I was going to post here but I didn’t like the article that much because it was too geared towards techies and I though it would be easier to write my own than go through the other one and criticize it.

If you are worried about what would make people leave your company then you are probably better positioned to keep turnover low than companies that don’t worry about it. And trust me a lot of companies don’t. However here is a list of some of the most common reasons that managers give me on a daily basis as to why they are looking. I am not going to present them in any particular order.

Money

People do leave for more money. It’s that simple. I know that there are plenty of studies and articles out there saying that more money won’t keep you in your job if you hate it and that is probably true but as a headhunter I am often amazed the amount of people I recruit to move laterally from one position to another and the reason is often money (or reason number two (which I will get to).

Are you paying your top employees fairly? Are you sure? Don’t rely too heavily on compensation surveys; they are often out of date and dependent on the participants actually giving accurate information. Want to know if you are paying your employees fairly? Call up a headhunter who specializes in the field and tell him you are looking to hire someone in whatever position you want to find the going market rate for. Ask him how much it would take to get a top-level person. You will know immediately if you are an employer of choice or what we headhunters call a “source company”


Location.

Gridlock and urban sprawl have combined to make commuting a huge issue for people. No one wants to spend 2 hours or more in their car every day and this adversely affects your company’s productivity. When I do a search nowadays the first thing I do is segment my targets not by industry but by location. I will look through my database for any potential candidates that are living near my client. And guess what? It is one of the easiest recruit calls to do. I just recently completed a search for a senior financial manager. The position was located in north Toronto. All I did was call all the people who were working downtown but lived in the northern suburbs. I had candidates willing to take a pay cut in order to eliminate commute. Conversely I have lost candidates because of the commute.

So what can you do? Well be more sympathetic to those in your firm who have long commutes. Are you letting them work flex hours?? Most companies say they do but the reality is that they only pay lip service to it. So they tell you can come in early but if you leave early you get the raised eyebrow. Of course you can prevent this by not hiring people who would be commuting for a long distance, but that might be discriminatory.

Family Owned Companies.

When I encounter a manager who is working for a family owned company I consider this a slam-dunk that I can recruit this person. First if they aren’t part of the family they know that no matter what they aren’t going to make it to the top echelons of the company. Second family owned companies have a reputation for being extremely tough places to work. Why? Because as one manager once put it “ you don’t know when you go in work if there’s going to be a target on your back or not”.

If you own the company give some thought to those who aren’t your blood relatives. You can scream at your relatives and they typically aren’t going to quit. But remember your employees aren’t your family.

Large Corporations.

On the opposite end of the spectrum people who work in large corporations often complain that the reason they are leaving is that they feel that they are unable to truly make a difference – or at least feel that they are making a difference. Often they will move to a smaller company where the job they are doing really seems to be having an effect. Additionally they often complain about the bureaucracy they encounter in larger companies. I worked on a search recently where the candidate hired came from one of the world’s largest corporations. His biggest complaint? The bureaucracy. It was just too hard to get something done. So now whenever I am calling potential recruits in that company I start talking about the bureaucracy right from the beginning. And guess what? It really makes a difference.

So you can’t do much about the size of your company but you might want to think about the bureaucracy and red tape in your company and how to cut down on that. Also think about ways to recognize your employees so they feel like what they are doing is actually being noticed.


Ceilings (glass and otherwise)

Want to make sure your employees are dusting their resumes off? When a management opportunity opens up hire someone externally instead of promoting them. What’s that you say? You don’t have anyone internally that could do the job?
Why?

I once knew a VP who prided herself in the fact that if she “got hit by a bus” (as she put it) she had her replacement ready to take over. Your organization should have a plan in place to develop talent internally. It should start right at the campus level. You can only steal from competitors so often and trust me that well is not infinite. So look around your organization. At the senior level how many of the mangers are homegrown and how many came from outside? If the majority came from outside I can tell you that there are some very unhappy middle managers in your organization and you had better hope I don’t get my hands on your phone list.

I could go on and on with a variety of other reasons but I would like to turn it over to the readers and ask you: What has caused you to leave your company ?

One of the reason’s listed above or have I missed some glaringly obvious ones??

I look forward to reading your comments.

It's Hilarious

Here's a smile via The Meatriarchy via Ghost of A Flea.

But WATCH OUT.
a) THE VIDEO IS OFFICE-SAFE.
b) But you need sound to enjoy it.
c) THE SITE IS covered with ads
    which are NOT OFFICE-FRIENDLY.

The Kassie Cult

Though he may fail as he vies for fame and glory
He tries so hard in each and every story.
That's Tennessee Tuxedo in his tales.
That's Tennessee Tuxedo and his tales

In every era there is always an emblematic figure whom the public chooses to represent some sector of human achievement.

In the American business world, Rockefeller was once the man who captured the popular imagination. More recently, Ted Turner was the business icon. And, now of course, it's Donald Trump.

In Canada, the best known businessman has, for some time, been newspaper baron, Conrad Black.

But Lord Black has fallen on hard times of late and we believe that renegade banker, David Kassie, is well-positioned to take his place.

Once a person becomes the object of a cult, people begin to sift through his childhood looking for indicators of his future accomplishments.

This must be a very important activity because when they can't find any indicators, people invent them.

Dan'l Boone killed a bar when he was three years old. George Washington chopped down the cherry tree. You know the routine.

We must assume, therefore, that the incipient power of David Kassie's symbolic image was revealed this week when the Globe & Mail started reporting on his childhood antics .

Apparently, young Davey was obsessed by an old cartoon show.

Tennessee Tuxedo was a Communist penguin who was always agitating to get better conditions in the zoo.

He would regularly announce that "Tennessee Tuxedo will not fail!" But his schemes always did fail whereupon he would turn to Phineas J. Whoopie who would teach him some simple scientific principles on his 3-D blackboard.

Tennessee would declare, "Phineas J. Whoopee, you're the greatest!" And, then he would fail again.

Young Kassie used to claim that Mr Whoopie, like he himself, was actually from the constellation Pleiades. And he would complain that it was an incredible strain to act like an ordinary human being on a regular basis.

As if in proof of this complaint, young Davey could often be found rocking back and forth repeating tag lines from the show with an incredible intensity.

He was also known to chant, "Who's milking the cow?" and "Malabar, Malabar, Malabar!"

Actually, we've also heard that Kassie was equally impressed by another fictional character and that the original name for Genuity Capital Markets was, in fact, Dudley Kane Enterprises after a business in a famous Canadian novel set in Kassie's hometown of Montreal.

Whatever their level of authenticity, Canadian Headhunter appreciates such stories and welcomes others about the secondary Genuity players, as well.

Not for any vulgar reasons, of course, but as part of the commonplace study of what makes great men tick.

So, if Dan Daviau liked Quick Draw McGraw, we want to know. And if Dr Phil Evershed never practiced medicine, we want to know that too.

As for Kassie's iconic status, we suspect that all he has to do to to assure it now is to buy a basketball team (obviously The Raptors) and marry a model.

And, as for the latter, we suggest that he could do no better than the stunning Mitsou Gelinas the former pop tart who was recently appointed Quebec's ambassador to the mainland by the CBC.

And, finally, a prediction: in two years time, Andy Willis of the Globe & Mail will publish a book on the Genuity-CIBC battle.

Canadian Headhunter will appear in the footnotes as the only blog that took a rabid interest in its every turn and that will be our only claim to fame before we, ourselves, fade into glory.

See Also: GenuityGang Strikes Back -- CIBC Recruiting Scandal -- David Kassie, Kingpin -- David Kassie's Dream -- Dan Daviau -- Earl Rotman -- Kassie Defiant -- Phil Evershed -- Hirst, Morrison, Eggertson -- Marie Cordero -- Bad 4 Recruiters -- Sweet Marie -- The Kassie Cult -- Kassie Honoured -- Hunkin's Millions -- BlackBerry Got 'Em -- Kassie Family Hunted -- Blackberry Mystery Solved -- The Genuity Revolution -- Technorati Tag: Genuity